What does it mean to say to someone I LOVE YOU or I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU?
Two expressions of love but totally different meanings.
For a long time I didn’t know the difference between the two, I actually thought it meant the same thing . I heard men and women say it to each other in romantic movies , where the man would say to the woman and vis versa ” I love you but am not in love with you” honestly it confused me. I tried to ask around but no one seemed to give me a satisfactory answer .
As I’ve gotten older , I’ve come to see that the difference between the two is extremely wide . It’s taken a while for me to understand but with my years of experience and a couple of relationships , now I do, and here is how I see it ….
I would use some examples to explain what I have come to understand is the difference between LOVING and BEING IN LOVE –
Loving – I love traveling by air , I love strawberry ice cream , I have said I love you, to friends as a sign of deep appreciation for getting me things I really wanted . I love my new jeep , I love watching James bond movies . But tomorrow If I couldn’t travel by air cos all commercial planes stopped flying or the country I live in suddenly bans strawberry ice cream for some reason or my jeep gets old and stops running , I would be really upset for a while but immediately get alternatives and am definitely sure get to love the alternatives too.
Now although if I was in love with any of those things above , I would grovel to everyone I knew who had a private jet to fly me to my destination, I would go to a different country no matter what it would cost me to get my strawberry ice cream , I would give my last penny to get my jeep re born, if that is possible because I won’t be able to live without it.
What people don’t know is that loving, by nature, is conditional. You love the way someone makes you feel, the way they smile the way she or he kisses, you love that she doesn’t talk too much , the shape of their body, maybe she’s a figure 8′ or he’s got a six-pack, maybe you love the way they calm you down or how they make you feel when they touch you ,you even love them cos you want to make love to them or because he or she is really rich and generous.
But what happens if this things change or you finally get what you want , once you’ve made love once you’ve had your fill, maybe she starts to nag you , now she talks too much , or her figure 8 becomes a figure 14 , his six-pack turns into a rolly prolly tyre , his hair-line starts receding. Worse case he or she looses their job or business goes burst and become broke. What happens to the love then? Most likely you quickly fall out of love as fast as you fell in love . You stop loving them and decided to find an alternative to fall in love with .
However Being in love is much deeper and an amazing feeling . You love the person in their entirety , it’s not their shape, money , the way they talk, walk , threat you . You love everything about them , what they stand for and what makes them who they are as a person. It wouldn’t matter if she jumps from a size 6 to a 18 or he starts developing a pot belly or his hair-line recedes , or if he used to have millions now he has hundreds , you would still love them regardless .
If you by any chance lose this person you are in love with , there is no finding an alternative because he or she has become part of you and your life. Part of you will be lost in that love. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone. And a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone you have been IN LOVE with.
But all that said, the ultimately LOVE is The definition of love in Gods word in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV).
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
This I believe is the kind of love we should all strive to have and am sure all others will follow .
God bless you .
Good morning ………