Letter from a divorced woman to her mother.


Dearest mother,
I thank you so much for everything you went through for me, you did work so hard to bring me up , sacrificed a lot to make sure I had what I needed , prayed for my every success but you forgot to tell me the truth about love and marriage……..

Mother , how could you not tell me that My husband was unique and like no other . That it takes both of us to make our marriage work .
You said I shouldn’t trust my husband , that men always disappoint you in the end.
You said never have a joint account with your husband.
You said I should make sure I put money aside , buy land, build , invest without my husband knowing
You asked me to keep it all from him
You told me he will betray me with another woman , a younger one, once he feels am too old for him
You said Everyman is useless , they are always having affairs and cannot be trusted .
You said all men lie and cheat on their wives.

Mum, you mislead me, you turned me into a paranoid wreck, I got married with the notion of “everyone man for himself” not “two become one” as the pastor who joined us together preached on our wedding day.
I mapped out my plan form the day I said “I DO “, I suspected my husband’s every move, checked his phones , his emails , called him all the time. My husband didn’t mind all this , he kept reassuring me, he just felt I was a bit insecure .
But as year’s added onto years I got worse and he got tired of convincing me he loved me and would never hurt me.
Mum, do you know what , He forgave me when he found out I had built a block of flats rented it out and was getting regular income from it . He forgave me when he found out I was in partnership with a friend of his, importing goods into the country and neither of us told him. He even forgave me when he found my savings account pass book with lots of money in it and I always nagged him that I was broke .

I almost turned him into a nervous wreck, he had no peace when he was with me, every day he came home I picked a quarrel with him, if it wasn’t him smelling of another woman, it was the time he came in, or him not calling or worse or I find a females no on his phone.
But you know what eventually sent me packing, my jealousy and rage. The last straw was when I got a call from a friend that she just saw my husband and a woman walk into an hotel, my friend gave me the address. I got in my car , wearing a pair of jeans and armed with a knife , drove to the hotel. As I walked in I saw my husband walking towards the lift , I hid behind a pillar, as he and the lady got in , I waited to see what floor it stopped on. It was the kind of lift that had the floor indicator on the outside. I walked towards the lift pressed the 3rd floor button . It was easy to find them I saw them walk into a room, went to the door it was slightly ajar , I walked in, without saying a word ,I launched at the lady and stabbed her right on the arm, calling her a whore, husband snatcher , screaming and shouting , my husband pushed me to the ground took the knife off me and rushed the lady to the hospital.

Mum , I got arrested for aggravated assault , but the lady asked to drop the charges. To make matters worse, she wasn’t even dating my husband , she was his client , she wanted my husband’s company to manage the hotel, she was just showing him around the different types of suites the hotel had and trying to get his advice on redecoration.

My husband was done, he filed for a divorce, the judge granted it, I could have killed that lady.

Mum, I had a wonderful husband , he loved me so much, was kind, caring, honest , generous and God fearing. You mislead me , I never gave him a chance , you used your own bitter experience with my father to ruin my life .

I am writing this letter to all the women out there, please trust your husband , love him and remember no two marriages are the same , because your parents didn’t have a smooth relationship doesn’t mean yours will be the same . It’s too late for me, but you still have a chance, TAKE IT……

Yours faithfully ,

Missed it , before it started .


  1. If only I read this letter years ago. I hope and pray someone reads this, learns from it and shares it with others. I sent this to mothers and daughters I know. Thank you for this. God bless.


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